Da Dominion: Home of DOMINIONCAST!

OK, so Frank Miller is starting to slip a bit.

I say this after having just seen his latest comic adaptation to the big screen, The Spirit. A movie that makes up what it lost in tension with lots of ass … and I mean a lot of ass. A shame it still doesn’t compensate.

Did you see Sin City? Great flick wasn’t it? It had a new illustratively gritty style of shooting and a series of interconnected stories that captured the pathos of the characters. The Spirit has Pathos, a henchman to the big bad guy played to comic relief effect ably by Louis Lombardi (Edgar from 24), but that’s the only pathos it has.

The Spirit, former slain cop Denny Colt turned charismatic vigilante golden age heroic zombie, warrants none. He’s unkillable, super athletic, and gets to fight for justice above the law and EVERYONE with a vagina wants him in it - even death itself is wet for him. Protecting Central City - named this only because Gotham is still taken - is his only committed relationship though . Sad, if he didn’t spend most of his time hitting on everything and stringing along the love interest/cop commissioner‘s daughter Dr. Dolan.

Ever catch 300? Good flick wasn’t it? A dramatically epic vision of one of the greatest military battle in history was crafted. Leonides was defending his freedom from a freakishly alien but ambitious foreign conqueror Xerxes. Pose Fu action done masterfully in each bloody combat scene. Samuel Jackson plays the nemesis of the Octopus, a stylistically insane mad scientist with the same powers as the Spirit, whom he created by experiment. He’s named for the cephalopod cause his tentacles are everywhere … supposedly. The name fits cause he’s mentally everywhere. He’s some kind of super pimp in the first scene, samurai in the next, Nazi officer then Cossack. Character concept is obvious: let’s play dress up with badass Sam Jackson, muthafucka!

The Spirit does Rapid Fu combat direction mostly, not very herky jerky but lots of pans to the shadow of what’s going on when he‘s beating the hell out of the 12th stupid clone of Lombardi. Otherwise, it’s mainly The Spirit getting shot by somebody until he needs to catch his breath whistling through multiple bullet holes like Daffy Duck when he takes a drink of water and it fountains out. Very cartoony violence abounds. When Jackson hits him with a toilet in the beginning you catch the theme.

The pluses are plus sized hips all through out. Eva Mendes. Scarlett Johansson. I was very disappointed when they couldn’t find walk on roles for Vida Guerra nor Kim Kardashian. The best scene was when our hero tracks the jewel thief Sand Seref (Mendes, cause Latin Wide Bottom isn’t a font name) through the city by showing a Xerox of her butt. It and Silken Floss’ (Johansson) chestiness were the highlights.

Wait for the DVD, and make sure your pause button is strong.

Relationships for the Unhip. Smarty sex. Actually just Rib, Dairy Queen, Hunin, Mrs. Hunin and myself commiserating on the difficulties of romance when you’re geeky awesome. Mrs. Hunin being the wife of Hunin, and being present, take his words with a grain whip *WUH-PISH!* Rib’s sexy is unstoppable and Dairy Queen can play her cards best, but all I want is a little appreciation and understanding … from super hot chick.

Dominion Cast 19 download - 54 mb, 59 mins

Music from the album Bleu by Djimi
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Geek or Nerd?
Nerdgasm
Lonely Youth
No Brains Allowed
Fake’in the Funk
To Smart for Sex?
The Leaky Crack Plumber
A Lady’s Edge is Expertise
Geeks: Be Funny … or Rich
What DO we Want?

My curry cutie Padma Lakshmi is back with a season of Top Chef New York on Bravo - the first closeted gay network! When not deciding who the best model, new fashion designer or the most drunk rich housewife is, come here to get your foody (culinary geek) on.

The challenges have always been the biggest draw for me - besides Mistress Masala Mounds - like this one from the last episode:

Guessing salt or pepper seems a little cheap to me, but peanut butter!?! The bird lady fucked that one royally. Watch rest of the episode to see where else she fails.

Carla (sistah raptor face) does have skills but is too jittery and soft spoken. She’ll either crack under pressure or get blamed for a team failure. Later in this episode she lets anther chef add something to her dish without ripping out his spleen for garnish. Danny boy also in trouble by breaking the cardinal rule of Bravo: the straightest can never win. I could see him in line for Lions tickets, or Raiders, or whichever teams are in New York - I don’t do sports, but even I can’t feign ignorance and wish our Detroit Lions were a NYC franchise. Now that he got cut from Top Chef, if he’s not busy now he should try out for our zero and fourteen football team - chef or athlete, he couldn’t hurt.

For the top two I’m seeing Jamie , lesbian survivor of “Team Rainbow“, and the Bald James Bond euro-villain Stefan. They seem the most driven and talented although I can really see the latter falling to overconfidence. Flirting with gay women, if you have a cock, is notoriously difficult. If he does manage to bed this blonde, competition or not he’s a winner!

His foreign partner Fabio is all charm and soiled English. He’s made too many mistakes and proves foreigners aren’t always number one. Rocco Dispirito says he wants bacon breakfast and you make an espresso shot and French toast? Me no lissen so good. Josea got top palette but I don’t see making it to the end. They seem to be covering a lot of his “friendship” with Leah. The type of buddies that are of different genders, have a shared passionate interest and commitments at home that hangs out together way from the cameras.

It’s not a soapy drama if there’s competition, DAMN IT! Still, let me check out this Victoria Secret show to get my hetero on for a while.

Remember those times I promised you a Dominion T-shirt, when we get them, for doing some service for us - one most of you didn‘t do?

WE GOT SWAG! Winter’s here and those of you that could’ve shown your loyalty are now left free-shirtless to endure chest colds, shivered timbers and needle nips.

Awww … they’re so warm too. Really, I’m wearing seven right now, but one would be enough. You could buy one now … or get some FREE BOOTY!! … or at least clothing for it.

Submit original designs/art to be emblazoned upon our gear here, post a link in the comments below or send them to dominus@dadominion.com. They will be judged by the High Citizens of our forums (those with titles, but the weeded ones could judge as well) . For every design chosen to be worthy , the designer will receive one item of less than $30 value from our Café Press store to receive for free!

Your artwork will also be showcased for all on this the main podium of Truth blog site to be Dugg, Stumbled and given other net love along with a link to your design site or portfolio. Art Themes - a few of the thousand words your art should symbolize in representing us:

“Sharp humor for a dull world.”

“Guy Greed”

“Your Dominus”

“Hunin, the Raven”

“Dominion Cast: Podcast of Power”

“Scaling Mount Uber”

You may also choose any blog quote of mine that inspires you.

[quickly spoken small print] Submissions must be ORIGINAL art - plagiarists will be made to eat raw haggis as well as face standard legal action. Family relations of Dominus Digga or Tribune Hunin may not enter. Contest void outside of the continental United States, we love our global readers - but not enough to pay for that much postage. Art will be accepted as pictures only. Excrement statues, Tie dye swaths or macaroni sculptures will not be considered and may make you an enemy of good taste in general. Submissions will become the property Da Dominion and Mythic Group - even if it sucks. We are not responsible for any eye strain inflicted reading this. [/quickly spoken small print]

Submissions will be open until December 18, 2008. Get to doodle’in!

I would do an ordinary “Best Bond” list survey, but we all know it’s fuck’in Sean Connery.

It’s not? Do you feel numbness on the left side of your body? Taste copper? A picture of Roger Moore gives you severe priapism? Don’t vote, see a doctor … a specialist.

The rest of you, choose the Bond actor that best carries on the 007 tradition in “schmooth Connaree fashun”:

George Lazenby

Roger Moore

Timothy Dalton

Pierce Brosnan

Vote here

Bond purists will ask about David Niven, from his portrayl of the old ass original Sir James Bond in Casino Royale. The 1967 version IS NOT a James Bond movie - but a satirical spoof of a Ian Fleming novel. Peter Sellers walked out on it, his opinion is good enough for me.

Daniel Craig is too immature to be considered. This Saturday I’ll be seeing the uber anticipated Quantum of Solace for review on Monday. I don’t read non-Dominion approved reviews - especially early ones, but just the title has me amped. If not the codename for some gimmicky McGuffin, Quantum of Solace means when broken down something akin to “the smallest possible measure of peace.”

I’ve been abstaining from caffiene all week to prevent getting ejected from the theatre for rock’in a nerdgasm. I’ll grab extra snack counter napkins just in case.