Heroes: Not so Heroic
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A couple of hardcore comic fan friends and myself - whom collected for merely a couple of years - used to assemble on Monday nights to watch NBC’s Heroes. We no longer do. It’s not because of schedule changes or my rise to Internet fame like a sea turtle gradually coming to the surface of obscurity for air; they merely see Heroes as a failed endeavor.
Failed?
I can sympathize being a recovering Lost one - a show I now consider televised crystal meth, but was easier to kick … I imagine, never turned tricks for an episode. Interest turns to fascination; fascination into confusion; confusion to fear; fear to hate: Jedi Psychology 101 - but I ‘m not suffering from not knowing the island’s secrets. Abrams may never fully reveal them, just make a damn movie promising more. Cloverfield’s sequel is coming out. Yippie, cause I’m dying to learn more about lice-ridden Godzilla - maybe a steady cam will result in fewer vomit stained theatres this time.
Heroes hasn’t left me embittered yet, but it’s odd to consider that ardent comic fans dislike it so much - check it out
I could attack naysayers personally. After all, it worked against Obama … oh, right. No need, the series has some definite issues.
1. Super-powers prefer Blondes. I don’t mind them myself but jeez there’s a lot of Aryan tail on the show. Mocha lovers had Maya, but now she’s cured and gone. Momma Petrelli ain’t cutting it for the spank bank. The muscle memory Monica was jailbaity cute - like a Black Claire with actual kick ass powers. She and that entire branch of the cast have faded out so far this season. Micah orphaned with Nikki’s death. This trend is opposed by another series tendency …
2. Keep the brothas down. Black comic fans HATE being slighted over relatable characters. We had Halle as Storm in X-Men, but then she had to get log slammed by Billy Bob in Monster’s Ball for the Oscar. Now it’s like, eeww. We can’t get the smell of Skoal and Slim Jims off her. Still, better him than movie hubby Diddy.
D.L. had phasing abilities to permeate matter, but he’d been shot three fuck’in times? Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me two more times and I’m off the show. They even finished off Nikki, Negro tainted, but feeling an imbalance of only four blondes on the show had to kinda bring her back with a long lost triplet Tracy. Usutu the precog I knew was gonna die as soon as I knew his power. Isaac Mendez at least succumbed to his fate voluntarily. Arthur Petrelli snuck up on the guy that can see the future. See the future, you see plot; you must die … Even if it doesn’t make sense. All we have is one-dimensional bad guy brotha captain power punch Knox. I know he’s gonna die before the end of this season. Oh no … NOW I’VE GOTTA DIE!!! Speaking of powers …
3. HOW THE FUCK DO MY POWERS WORK? I do get it. Heroes is a drama first with super ability action second. The emphasis is on the story told over mechanical coherency. This would seem paradoxical, as coherency is part of a good story, but then again with so much time travel we’re only giving science lip service at this point.
Papa Petrelli drains Adam Monroe’s healing factor causing the immortal to age 500 years in an instant and die … why? Just watched the new episode and the old man didn’t get re-paralyzed with the eclipse though his healing was gone. Sylar can study your brain to take your powers, being sensitive to complexity like a watchmaker… or psychoanalyze you. This one has a bit of sense to it. Without her super speed Daphne is crippled? I would think limping at the speed of sound would be an interesting - if outright fuck’in hilarious - ability.
So with all this why am I still watching?
There’s nothing better on in its timeslot - sorry One Tree Hill - and I do like a lot of the central conflicts. How will Peter get his powers back? How will Arthur Petrelli be defeated? Is Sylar becoming good? What’s Claire’s first sex scene gonna look like? It’s a soap opera with super abilities that’s on weekly - much more story than a twenty-five-page comic that only comes out once a month. I’ve got comic geek enough in me for the show to sate my niche tastes.
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[...] Heroes: Not so Heroic A couple of hardcore comic fan friends and myself - whom collected for merely a couple of years - used to assemble on Monday nights to watch NBC’s Heroes. We no longer do. It’s not because of schedule changes or my rise to Internet fame like a sea turtle gradually coming to the surface … [...]
[...] Heroes: Not so Heroic A couple of hardcore comic fan friends and myself - whom collected for merely a couple of years - used to assemble on Monday nights to watch NBC’s Heroes. We no longer do. It’s not because of schedule changes or my rise to Internet fame like a sea turtle gradually coming to the surface … [...]