Way of the Warrior
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I’m sitting here watching REAL reality TV about maybe the most fucked up job in the country. Peep shows jizz mopper? Man-on-man porn fluffer? OK, this IS better than those — with fringe benefits of cultural respect and romantic idealization: the Military. PBS recently finished a documentary miniseries called Carrier, which follows the lives of enlisted men and officers aboard the aircraft carrier USS Nimitz. Raised on Robotech and GI JOE, the latter I still think was a Republican-approved enlistment programming for the upcoming WWIII, this sounds pretty fuck’in cool. Sharp uniforms, honor and tradition, occasionally killing Zentraedi, sex with green-haired alien chicks - teh kewlnis right?
In reality, according to those living the life, it’s high school on the high seas. Still sound good? Sausage to honey bun ratio is 10:1 - I AIN’T talk’in breakfast - and if you do get landing strip clearance there’s career-crashing punishment for it at a Captain‘s Mast hearing. Do they actually tie you to the mast of the ship and paper cut your ass with pages advertising the career opportunities you’ll now miss out on before dousing the searing slits with salt water? YES!!!!1
No, not really. It is serious though, like landing a fighter on a rocking carrier deck at night before you run out of fuel - they could die doing routine shit! These kids handle bombs and are responsible for lives yet make a little more than the guy that supersizes your fries or the dudes that rap at the Taco Bell drive through. Even the Russians are start’in shit again. They didn’t even drop a single bomb in their deployment to Iraq - the carrier‘s sole function in the war; but many did miss the birth of kids, family tragedies, and had their pregnant girlfriends swept away by ex-boyfriends. Rough stuff, and many severely question the point of war - in darkened rooms with just the cameraman and safe from insubordination charges.
I really enjoyed this series with it’s the no spin bullshit and honest portrayal of the people on the lines in their own words and feelings. Having a military tradition in my family going from my great-grandfather in World War I to my brother soon to ship out to the gulf, I of course have nothing but respect for those serving. BUT, I’ll be damned if I’d gamble my ass for those draft-dodging punks in power.
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