20 Nov

Decree V - Dominion Design Contest

Remember those times I promised you a Dominion T-shirt, when we get them, for doing some service for us - one most of you didn‘t do?

WE GOT SWAG! Winter’s here and those of you that could’ve shown your loyalty are now left free-shirtless to endure chest colds, shivered timbers and needle nips.

Awww … they’re so warm too. Really, I’m wearing seven right now, but one would be enough. You could buy one now … or get some FREE BOOTY!! … or at least clothing for it.

Da Draws

Submit original designs/art to be emblazoned upon our gear here, post a link in the comments below or send them to dominus@dadominion.com. They will be judged by the High Citizens of our forums (those with titles, but the weeded ones could judge as well) . For every design chosen to be worthy , the designer will receive one item of less than $30 value from our Café Press store to receive for free!

Your artwork will also be showcased for all on this the main podium of Truth blog site to be Dugg, Stumbled and given other net love along with a link to your design site or portfolio. Art Themes - a few of the thousand words your art should symbolize in representing us:

“Sharp humor for a dull world.”

“Guy Greed”

“Your Dominus”

“Hunin, the Raven”

“Dominion Cast: Podcast of Power”

“Scaling Mount Uber”

You may also choose any blog quote of mine that inspires you.

[quickly spoken small print] Submissions must be ORIGINAL art - plagiarists will be made to eat raw haggis as well as face standard legal action. Family relations of Dominus Digga or Tribune Hunin may not enter. Contest void outside of the continental United States, we love our global readers - but not enough to pay for that much postage. Art will be accepted as pictures only. Excrement statues, Tie dye swaths or macaroni sculptures will not be considered and may make you an enemy of good taste in general. Submissions will become the property Da Dominion and Mythic Group - even if it sucks. We are not responsible for any eye strain inflicted reading this. [/quickly spoken small print]

Submissions will be open until December 4, 2008. Get to doodle’in!

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18 Nov

The Trek Money Shot

A few months ago the trailer for Watchman dropped and every comic geek I know creamed themselves over what it promised: the grittiest most original comic movie in a generation of excellent films in the genre. So adoring was their relentless felatio, I had to check out the graphic novel for myself.

Was it clear that they were felating the advertisement - and not I? Had it been me, out of respect for their … fanatical gender-bending enthusiasm, I’d have finished it by now - instead of being on the last chapter - plus have written on it several times as well. Since this wasn’t the case (thankfully, glory holes are so impersonal) I’ll merely say that so far Watchman is interesting and I‘ll likely see the movie whenever it comes out.

I’m making you squeamish to make this point: I saw this trailer before the Quantum of Solace …

Yeah … I’ll let you Trekkies clean up after that nerdgasm. No shame. I’m typing this in a towel with my pants in the hamper and drinking green Gatorade - while pretending it‘s Aldebaran whisky.

Looks packed with action out the gills but the characterization of Kirk and Spock seems most intriguing. I’ve never really wondered how two opposite dudes could become such great buds. One a brash human that deserves a triple ass whup’in for destroying that vintage Corvette - or Mustang, I’m no motor head car geek - and the other a half alien recluse smart ass that’s stronger than you and three friends. The car can be forgiven since they don’t value money - but fuck, it‘s five-century-old mint! If the story line involves Kirk getting Spock laid through his first Pon Farr that could work but would be inanely sophomoric.

More than likely these tattooed bad guys (retro Klingons?) have driven the stakes so high both must bond over their duty to Starfleet and perhaps Captain Pike. Sylar is looking good as young Spock, but Zoe Saldana looks a little slender to be Uhura. I guess several more years of red bean cubes and yellow cornbread wedges could give her the signature thickness we‘ve come to expect from the first hot sistah on TV. Young Jimmy Kirk looks at bit too pretty for my tastes but fuck it - he’s just got to overreact and be awesome.

I’ve said I liked Cloverfield, and am not a fan of giant monsters that come from nowhere, the parasites they carry nor vomit inducing shaky handed camera operation. These Trek prequels look to overcome the issues Star Wars had: a leapt to conclusion fueled only by avid fan boy optimism. Abrams - or whoever the hell edited this trailer - did their job and I’m MANICALLY pumped for May 9th, 2009.

*swaps out Gatorade for Captain Morgan’s* Cheers!

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17 Nov

Bond Begins

Like Batman being remade from zero, so too is 007, and thankfully so. Brosnan may well be my favorite non-Connery Bond but his snarky Remington Steele style no longer fit’s these times of economic recessions and salient global threats - as opposed to diamond smuggling, nuclear Russian satellites and Grace Jones sex. An old franchise can only benefit from a fresh perspective and while Casino Royale brought that to Bond’s franchise, Quantum of Solace is nice continuation on this learning how to be an international badass amidst a Truly messed up world. It’s time for a fresh start.

Ironically, the beginning credits sequence of QS was my least favorite in a long time. “Another way to Die” was sung by Alicia Keys - whose voice doesn’t sound right singing rock - and Jack White whom to many can’t really sing despite being a good writer. Yet, White’s title and lyrics don’t really seem to go with the movies themes that much. Another way to die: shot, stabbed, drowned in oil, or making out with a giant dude with metal teeth; confirmed, there are a lot of ways to die in a Bond flick - the fuck else is new?

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Chris Cornell’s “You know my Name” was perfect for Casino Royale - describing and animating the world of kill or be killed a new double 0 agent runs and guns through like a house of cards while killing poorly detailed goons along the way. My favorite of all the credit sequences being Cheryl Crow’s “Tomorrow never Dies”, which I’ll pop in the DVD just to hear and repeat several times. Still, points to Quantum’s opening for brining back the tastefully shadowed naked chicks.

Some have found the new Daniel Craig Jimmy B a bit too moody and perhaps even feminized. They may have a point since the super macho philanderous smirking killer Bond of the past being made into a determined man that’s still able to feel the job’s cost in terms of his own humanity is indeed feminine by comparison - the way a Walther PPK is girly compared to a Smith and Wessun 500. Notice though that the PPK will still kill you. It‘s not like James is keeping a tear-stained journal of his grievous sins and calling back the exotic chicks he shakes and stirs. Actually, he‘s more into the serious relationship - until the chick betrays your love for a world class asshole then dies from her own plotting and you‘ve got to make a second movie to come to terms with it (see Casino Royale).

Ok, he’s not keeping a diary, but his martini’s are being diluted with British tears - just don’t show me, please. He’s still learning how to seduce innocent women and inadvertently get them killed for the love of his big seven (one down so far in Solace).

The vicariously entertaining playboy of yester year is mostly gone. Bond is simply more realistic now, less dashing and more out cold. Villains are not inexplicably rich crackpots with crazy super devices of world destruction/domination. They’re businessmen taking advantage of culturally relevant catch phrases to seize power globally under the guise of helping the planet. I haven’t seen a fancy gadget in two movies now, and nor do I really miss them since we are in the Jack Bauer high skill needs little hardware paradigm of foreign policy. If Roger Moore would be tasked with hunting down Bin Lade, Craig’s Bond would be going after the head of Haliburton and maybe even a certain villainous Vice President of a former British colony - and I’m not talking about former Deputy Prime Minister of Canada A. Anne McLellan either, I said former colony.

Despite all this post-modernization, we still have enough good old-fashioned action in the Quantum of Solace. I think there’s a chase scene involving every mode of travel except skateboard and Chocobo - there was this Emu ranch scene … nah, I wish. The fight choreography was directed with the Jason Bourne style of Rapid fu and scenery was well implemented in the tension of the scenes. Fights on narrow Italian mountain roads, boat chases through high traffic ports, scaffolding duels - moody or not this is the most athletic stunt saturated Bond we’ve seen in a while. Also, like any great action movie the talky dialogue parts are sharp with enough gravitas to give weight to the central conflicts, therefore raising the stakes for the action.

See Quantum of Solace even if you have to trek across a desert to view it in a burning hotel.

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14 Nov

Dominion Cast 15 - Bloggaversal

We’re back with a full funny discussion of our travels through the internet and the hazards to sanity we’ve come upon. Rib, Anson (Wordsmyth), nordic hunk Hunin and myself ponder if blogging is dead, wonder the URLs in search of knowledge while making shallow friendships and anonymous enemies. Contents are not safe for work, but if you can play other casts at full volume for all to hear at your job it may be safe enough for your work.

Da Dominion is not responsible for your termination. If you can press buttons, we may have a new posting for you though:


Great time saver, small loss of quality.



Dominion Cast 15 download (57 minutes, 52 MB)
Music from the album The Fabulous Life of Gatsby by Kammerer

Features:
The WordSmyth, Tongue on Cheek, Everyday Murderers, W: for Weak, GI Geocaching, Convict PSA
Blogging is Dead
Wandering the Web
Eve’s Blog:
That’s Funy Because
Fred Hicks RPG Design Livejournal: Driving Blind
Frens and Frenemies
HATE.com
Why blog? : Power of the Word

 

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13 Nov

Second Best Bond

I would do an ordinary “Best Bond” list survey, but we all know it’s fuck’in Sean Connery.

It’s not? Do you feel numbness on the left side of your body? Taste copper? A picture of Roger Moore gives you severe priapism? Don’t vote, see a doctor … a specialist.

The rest of you, choose the Bond actor that best carries on the 007 tradition in “schmooth Connaree fashun”:

George Lazenby

Roger Moore

Timothy Dalton

Pierce Brosnan

Vote here

Bond purists will ask about David Niven, from his portrayl of the old ass original Sir James Bond in Casino Royale. The 1967 version IS NOT a James Bond movie - but a satirical spoof of a Ian Fleming novel. Peter Sellers walked out on it, his opinion is good enough for me.

Daniel Craig is too immature to be considered. This Saturday I’ll be seeing the uber anticipated Quantum of Solace for review on Monday. I don’t read non-Dominion approved reviews - especially early ones, but just the title has me amped. If not the codename for some gimmicky McGuffin, Quantum of Solace means when broken down something akin to “the smallest possible measure of peace.”

I’ve been abstaining from caffiene all week to prevent getting ejected from the theatre for rock’in a nerdgasm. I’ll grab extra snack counter napkins just in case.

 

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